Imagine this scene…

I’m sitting across from this Japanese girl with incredible cleavage at a sushi restaurant in midtown Manhattan. Our table is on the second floor, right next to a waterfall (yes, there’s a fucking waterfall in the restaurant!). Chill lounge music bumps in the background as the tables fill up with couples.

At some point, I look up from the menu. My gaze narrowly avoids…

Before I get into the blog post, I want to give an update on what’s been going on (and why I’ve been somewhat lax about updating this blog). For the last few weeks, I’ve felt more inspired and productive than ever to build Date Hotter Girls.

As ridiculous as it sounds, something about this company really speaks to me on a very deep. Even before we’d thought of the name, Date Hotter Girls was what I wanted to do…

I could almost see his spirit laid across the floor, shattered, crunching underneath the bustle of a Lower East Side wine bar. I stood off in the corner, not unlike a trainer during a 12-round boxing match. I was ready to yell some motivational tidbits in his ear, or do what little I could to dress his wounds, but not much more.

At least a dozen times that night I spat my personal mantra at him: It’s not about them; it’s about you…

I was hoping to get into more of a “routine” of updating this blog, but I’ve been finishing a ton of projects that keep pulling me away from writing on this blog!

Some of those projects are non-girl related (e.g., magazine articles on cavemen, SAT math prep apps, etc.) but many of those projects ARE girl related. Namely…

I wrote my reaction to the Occupy Wall Street Movement (and it explains the lifestyle of a “self-made man”)…

Last year I wrote the 10 Best Texts to Send Girls…OF ALL TIME. Now, time hasn’t ended and those 10 texts are still totally relevant and effective.

But since these posts are fun to put together, and I think they teach good fundamentals for texting and communicating with women, I decided to follow up last year’s post with another 10 texts, straight from my iPhone…

I remember exactly where I stood when I heard it. I was in 7th grade. I was walking through the hallway of the science wing and passing by a group of older kids, cooler kids. These were the “popular” kids.

As I approached the huddled mass, I caught a snip-it of a question: “…going to get porn?”

Then, he said it. A freshman named Dan Beck, already a notorious seducer at the ripe of fifteen, sneered. The crowd went silent as he prepared to speak the words that would forever color my perception of cool. He said…

This summer the company really took off, due to the success of The Advanced Dating Strategies. Now that I have a little breathing room, I’ve been able to devote more time to other things…like writing my memoir.

This is something I’ve dreamt about since I really began writing at 17, after taking a creative writing class. I’ve always wanted to tell the story of my life through the women I’ve encountered. Obviously, not all those women were girlfriend—or even liked me. But I feel (and have always felt) that a lot of my identity and personality has been formed through my experiences with women—both good and bad…

As the name implies, self-reference means you point out something you did or are going to do. I’ll demonstrate exactly what I’m talking about in a moment, but first I want to explain why this strategy is so effective.

Most of the time when guys chat with women, they try to come off perfect. This is why some men brag, other men “DHV,” and still others just try to appear like they got it all figured out. Logically and intuitively it makes sense to act like this; however, in reality, this accomplishes the exact opposite of attraction…

Alright! So Zack and I have been crazy swamped coordinating a few different projects, but I wanted to post something quick about a comic book I created. I know, I know…it’s a little dorky. But, ever since I’ve been a little kid, I’ve always loved comic book art.

So to spice things up a bit, I retold the story of how Zack and I had our “breakthrough moment” after years frustration when learning how to succeed at dating. Here’s a little “sample” to check out…

If we were to meet up, have a drink together, and then go meet women, it would only take us seeing you do one approach to figure out if you’re good with women or not. It wouldn’t necessarily matter if you “got” the girl. No.

Over all the years, we’ve learned there are really only two ways to tell if a guy’s good with women. Here’s how: when approaching, are the girls:

1. Loving him, or
2. Hating him?

Your pride—The number one thing that holds most guys back from meeting a girl who really excites them is their own stupid pride. Get over yourself. Risk rejection. Stop believing that anyone gives a shit about you, your “reputation,” or how you’re being perceived. Put your pride on the line and go for the girl.

Your laziness—Girls aren’t going to pick themselves up. If you don’t actively make a habit of going out to meet women, you’re not going to enjoy the success you want. Meeting and dating women is a lifestyle, NOT some fad you do for a couple weeks then stop. Get into the habit of TAKING ACTION by getting over your laziness…

A question I’m constantly asked is whether I feel it was necessary that I went through all the “bullshit” dating advice before I arrived at my simplified philosophy. And my answer is always, “I really don’t know.” Who can really say whether or not the bad advice helped me in some bizarre, roundabout way?

Regardless, as I was drifting off to sleep last night, I was thinking of all the things I once did that were just a complete waste of time. For me, I only got into dating advice for one reason: to get better at dating women. I didn’t want self-help. I didn’t want a Tony Robbins-style personal transformation. I didn’t want to become more spiritual. I just wanted to be happier around women…

Sometimes I feel like a fortuneteller. I can often tell a guy’s future. I can tell how a guy’s is going to progress, what sort of girl he’s going to end up with, and how happy he’ll most likely be.

But I don’t know this by some mystical magic ball or an enchanted set of tarot cards. No, my augurs come from something much less exciting…

I can tell by the questions he asks me. As someone who gets bombarded with questions every day…

Neil Strauss is the worst. I’m not name-calling, bickering, or launching some underhanded smear campaign. Strauss is the worst because he’s the lowest form of human—he’s a betrayer of trust. In Dante’s Inferno, traitors occupy the lowest ring of hell. And such would seem an appropriate place for someone who has betrayed so many well-intentioned men.

Now let me address the fan-boys, whiners, and critics right off the bat. This essay isn’t about smashing on “negs” or calling out his homoerotic fashion sense. While that stuff is entertaining as unintentional comedy, this essay is serious…

He made out with the ugly girl first.

I’d told him to approach the redhead he’d been eyeing all night. Tom gazed at me with his glassy blue eyes, and then nodded. He took a deep breath, turned, and made his way toward her. The redhead was reclined against the pool table, her tits pressed tightly against her retro t-shirt, and she had a bored look on her face.

Right as Tom was within earshot of her, he turned to the girl standing next to her: the short, chubby booze-bag girl. I palmed my face in frustration…

Before I delve into dating, let me digress for a moment. I want to confess something…

I suck at sports.

I’m uncoordinated. I don’t have much leg speed. And my body seems unable to accept the “proper form” of any sort of sports movement—from the wrist flick of a jump shot to the elbow snap of a golf swing. I suck. For most of my life, I had to endure my suckiness at sports…

Newbs—you gotta love ‘em. Whether you’re learning how to become better with women or playing some dorky multiplayer videogame, there will always be “newbs”—people trying something for the first time.

Like high school freshmen, newbs often have ridiculous expectations derived from little or no experience. That’s why newbs are often so easy to laugh at. These are the guys who post on internet message boards about wanting to know the “secret line” to get the wild orgy with the harem of bisexual strippers…

Stop. If you want to see the world through rose-colored glasses, stop reading right now. Seriously, what I’m about to write is going to be raw, brutal, and hurtful for most people. So, please, if you like “feel good” dating advice articles, just leave now and go check out David Wygant’s blog or something.

Because this going to be dark—real dark. My inspiration for this came when I was sweating on a treadmill, listening to Tool’s “The Grudge”, and realized most of my greatest life achievements have come as a direct outgrowth of my anger, frustration, and desperation…

So the last few weeks I’ve been hard at work on developing my own iPhone app. I designed it as a mini-course on getting over “approach anxiety.” Having an app to help coach you through those crucial moments when you see an attractive girl seemed like the perfect use for an app (since you can just pull it out of your pocket and use it as an approach coach.)

Anyway, Apple just approved it and it’s available in the app store! You can check it out by typing in the keyword: ApproacHER or you can learn more on the information page, here…

Whenever I meet guys looking to improve their success with women, one underlying question always permeates everything they do: when will I be good with women? Every guy who gets into improving his success with women really only wants thing, which is to have success with women. Some guys refuse to endure the process necessary for that success, so they give up; other guys are willing to going through the process, but only do it with the ultimate outcome in mind.

I completely understand the feeling. Any guy who wants to improve his dating success does so because he’s frustrated. No matter what the reason, every guy embarks on the “dating success” journey for one reason and one reason only…